almondeye7's Diaryland Diary ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Peaches and Jokes On Saturday I go see my Grandparents, And I don't know if I really want to. Not that I don't love them but because they are so sick. I can't stand to see my grandpa stuggle to breath. I can't stand to see my Grandma unable to stand up sometimes. I'm afraid of getting old and sick. Not afraid of dying mind you just sick. I just can't understand way God would allow so much suffering tord the end of ones life. After all isn't growing older supposed to be peaceful? I still remember the smell of homemade goodies wafting out of gradmas kitchen when I was younger. Peach Pie's as I recall. She would cook all day...We would go out into the garden and I would help my grandma pick the peaches so that she could can them. I used to watch my grandpa work in the garage...he was so strong to me. He would drive me down to the toy store and let me pick any toy I wanted. And grandpa used too tell the best jokes...now he can barley utter a word...Grandma dosn't cook anymore. She just sits there in her chair next to grandpa and they both look like thier ready to go. My grandpa has told his wife of 61 years that he's ready for God...to old and tired he says. Honestly it is my grandfather who will die first but I am certain that within months grandma will be gone to. I think: How can they live without one another? I wish just for a moment I could go back in time and see them as they were so long ago. Healthy and full of life. Why dose the body and mind betray us? What is the resoning behind it? Shouldn't they live life without being in pain? I love them so much and although I have prepared myself for the time when one of them goes, I really haven't come to terms with thier loss. What happens to the rest of the famiely? Grandma and Grandpa was the glue that held everyone together. I'll miss thier house...the house I spent my childhood... I remember vividly sitting up in a tree in the yard waiting for the ice cream truck. I could go on and on with my stories...but in truth when i make the trip up to see them...I feel like it's the last time every time I go. Like I keep think to myself "this is the last time your ever going to hug them" I don't know how to act...I so much want my own daughter to know them...but I know that she won't. I wish them just one day of life without pain before they die. This is a wish that I have had for sometime. I pray that they go quickly and peacefully. I can't wait to taste those peach pies and hear one more joke... 8:51 a.m. - 2002-06-06 ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- |
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