almondeye7's Diaryland Diary
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And the little guy gets to do the BITCH work
I am pissed. Just totaly pissed off. I can't belive I work here. How did I think this company was so great? Because I was lied too. Thats right. My employer lied to me and the other 2 employees that work with me. Maybe I should rewind:
On Monday I came into the office and was told that we (the emplyees) need to construct these folders for one of our coustomers. However, This is not our job. It's the job of the plant that works with us, however John, (the tight assed old man) and Eric, (his devoted son) left on a "famiely" vacation to Mexico this past weekend, and neglected to tell us anything about this special project. What we have found is total bullshit. The folders, (there are over 4000 to assemble) Were supposed to be done by the plant. But apparently the plant wanted to charge extra for the project...seeing it was a large order. So John bestowed the duty upon us, his "loyle" 3 steeds.**Note the sarcasam** Whats more is they, as well as our coustomer expects this to be done by the end of the week. Moreover, John and Eric didn't tell our coustomer that we were doing it because it is not in the contract and we'll lose them. Apprently this is a big deal to the company. So, they lied to the coustomers as well. But nooooo the ball dosent stop falling there....no no no no...there is also the matter of what else I found out today. When I was first hired they took me downstairs to see the printing press, telling me that "someday" I mite be working down here doing imaging and inking. This was the whole reson I was excited about the job in the first place, I was told that, in a year or two, I would be trained for a higher position within the company. Mind you, that this position that I was "training" for was a grand position, with lots of money involved. All lies and pipe dreams. As it turns out, the printing presses belong to a whole differnt company that isn't even invoved with us at all. In fact we don't even do any work with them. We just rent an office space out of another printing companies office. So really the truth is that there is no better position. There is no hope of growing with this company. because it's not going any where. Eric and John treat thier buisness like a hobbie or something. They don't care about there employees nor do they care about busniess ethics. The other 2 emplyees that I work with informed me that they too, were promised that eventualy they would move down to the presses as well. Never Happened. Both of them have been here for about 2 years. On top of everything else I'm beginning to understand that this company is truly a joke. It took me a long time to find this position. It looked important...from the surface. But here comes my harsh lesson: Nothing here is what it seems.
I feel stuck again. In a position that, now I know for sure will not go anywhere. And that I can't grow with. There are so many factors into whats been hidden from me and the other emplyees here. My raise that was supposed to come in Oct., may not come. The other two people never got thiers. I thought that I was being hired into an honest ethical company that I could grow with. But as it turns out I was hired by an old fart with bad, outdated business sense. I just feel funny about working for company that needs to hide things from it's emplyees. It feels wrong. Now I feel depressed.
I relised something about myself very recently. It's not about a paycheck anymore for me. It's about knowlege and experience. It's about building a stong resume. It's about self worth and dignaty. I want to be important at my job. I want to feel secure. It used to be where I would get a job and not be chalenged and think " Wow. A skate job! Rock on!" But now I WANT to be challenged. I WANT to learn new skills. My hope was that in a few years, I would leave here and take the knowlege and experience that I gained elsewhere. What knowlege do I hope to gain in this dismal place? How to effectivly lie to your employees and coustomers? How to pass the buck in the wrong direction? How to make yourself look like an ass?
I'm at a point in my life that I need my job to be secure and reliable. After all what else should one expect? This sucks a cock. I am just floored at the things that I have learned today. And after luch I get to go back in the other room and continue to constuct these stupid folders. AHhhh... the things I have done for a paycheck...shall we go over it?
I've folded towles. Thousands and thousands of them...for the opening of a Bed, Bath, and Beyond store.
I've dug trenches in the rain working for a constuction company through of all things Labor Ready.
I've put up with countless fast food establishments, and thier flare for total gross out.
I've hawked magazines and entered nice old women into fake contests, all for a paycheck.
I've sold software and call centers and security systems by solicting to people in the evenings...(rotten I know)
Still, in the quest to feed myself and my kid I have done just about everything. Finely I find someplace decent(I thought so anyway. And it turns out that it's not so decent, now is it? So what to do now is what is on my mind. Deal with it? I guess I have to for now, especially given the fact that the ecomomey is going to shit and the job market is even worse.
I'll try. I'll try to come in here evey day and turn the other check to the unethical doings here. Ok Angela, just be thankful you have a job. I need to keep that in my head. Some people should be this lucky. I'll just bide my time. I want to feel important again. I want to be, at a job that I'm indepensable. How dose that feel? I wonder. I wouldn't know.
11:39 a.m. - Wednesday, Aug. 14, 2002
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