almondeye7's Diaryland Diary ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- The Tree Well I don't know if I have any more fans out there. I can't even be sure Chris reads this anymore. He used to be my # 1 Fan. So he says. But like the rest of us he has things he'd rather be doing then reading about a free sprit with a lost soul. Let me explaine. When I was 10 I fell from a tree and broke my arm. Not uncommon for a 10 year old I guess. But something happened to me that day. That day I remember my mom telling me not to climb that tree. Of course I did. I remember steping with my left foot onto the first piece of lose bark. Then the right, then another piece of lose bark. The smell was of sap and my hands were already getting sticky. I remember I felt strong. I was climbing pretty high now....I was even getting dizzy. But as kids do I was going to push myself, see how high I could climb. I remember holding onto a rather weak branch when before I knew it my feet sliped from under me and I was falling.....I think I screamed. But Then for a few moments everything was strange. You see I remember letting go of the branch because it was cutting into my hand, I remeber the lose bark falling, tumbling out of time with me. It was almost like watching a movie, I felt myself falling and falling and falling...... I heard nothing except a faint voice...was it my screams? To this day I still can't be sure. I saw a light. Now I know EVERYONE claimes to see a light when this sort of thing happens, there really is no other way to explaine it....but I jump ahead of myself. I don't think it was really a light but what ever it was it was warm. and safe. and I wanted to go there. I kind of hung there in suspended time, everything was slow and hazy. It was sort of like the Matrix in that there was no since of time. At least not for me. Then like a rubber band something took me back. It was rushed upon me like a flooded river damn. It nipped at my heals and from my toes to my scalp I felt a tingling....and then I felt no pain. None. I thought I was dead.
Can you imagine being 10 years old and thinking you were dead? When I opened my eyes I was laying on my back on sort of this grassy hill. A bed of soft, moist earth. I looked up and saw the branches of the tree swaying with the icey afternoon wind. How high had I climbed? I still don't know. All I knew is when I tried to move, my arm stabed me with pain. A clean break on my wrist. I shuffled home in a dazed, panicked sort of way....cradling my arm with my other. But as I was sitting in the hospital waitng for the doctors to set it, I kept wondering what had happened to me. Even a 10 year old knows when something is out of the norm. I said nothing, kept my mouth shut in fear of being laughed at by my peers or told that I must have been mistaken by my parents. That what I thought had happened didnt happen at all, that I had imagined it. But I didn't. I had an out of body experience that day....I was 10 and it hasn't happened to me since then. Sometimes I wish it would. It was sureal and even conforting. I don't know what made me think of that memory, it gets so hard to think out the details of that day. The smell up in the tree for example, it was the cleanest smell I have ever known...It was crisp and clear and I wanted to breath that air in for a life time...Even the ground below looked different to me. I saw things from way up there that I hadn't before...Like the way the paterns in the grass and earth below made sort of a triangle...The way the rocks below made shadows that distorted truth. Like I said, I have no idea who reads this diary anymore...but there, now you know why I'm a lost soul...A sycumore tree stole my essence when I was 10 years old. ~~~Angela~~~ 7:33 a.m. - Thursday, Sept. 19, 2002 ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- |
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